Men Take Longer To Connect Than Women

When it comes to dating men and women have different approaches.  One significant difference is when first starting to date.  For many women, men seem to be much slower to commit to a more serious relationship.  The main reason for this difference in willingness to commit is how men and women look for potential partners.

* Please note: I am broadcasting this article and when broadcasting an idea you are not able to cover all the exceptions.  There are exceptions, you might be an exception but for much of the broad public these broad statement holds true and I will back up this idea with evidence.

When men search for a woman, they tend to have an idea of the kind of woman they would like to date both physically, mentally and emotionally.  When they approach women they take baby steps as to finding out who they are.  What I mean by this is men tend to look at a woman and think, “yes, I’m physically attracted to her, but what is her personality like.”  Which is why he will approach her and start talking to her, after a few moments of conversation he will decide if he wants to go on a date with her.  A guy knows it easy to seem interesting for a few minutes but over longer periods of time it can be much tougher.  After a few dates he will start seeing either characteristics of what he would like to have in a woman he dates or red flags will begin to pop up.  If no red flags pop up, then he will start looking to see if the woman he is dating has lasting potential meaning will she stick around during the tough times.

As you can see men take a slow step by step approach to learning about a woman and making sure she is someone he would want to commit too.  This is why it can takes months before a man will commit to a relationship and if he doesn’t commit it is because he has seen something that caused him to avoid a serious relationship.

From what I have been told by many women friends both directly and by how they describe potential partners is that women are constantly searching for that man that they have in their mind.  When they meet a man who dresses accordingly, has similar mannerisms as their dream man and has similar personal beliefs many women (not all women) jump on the idea that this man could be the one that they are searching for.  That is the big difference between men and women when meeting.

A perfect example of this can be seen on the reality tv show “Bachelor In Paradise”  If you don’t know what the show is essentially they take old contestants of the bachelor/bachelorette show and they bring them together under one roof.  Each day, a rose ceremony occurs where either the men or women must give a rose to someone they are interested in dating.  The twist occurs when they send more men and women into the mix, so increasing the dating pool.

Now there are a few couples on the island, as there are always exceptions.  There is also one man who is also head over heels for a woman he is dating and she is very scared by how intense his feelings are.  However, the majority seem to include women complaining that the men they have met all have cold feet and don’t seem to be there for the right reasons.

While half of the women on bachelor in paradise may be right in that some of the men just came to meet and date a variety of women, the other half seem to be genuinely interested in finding a serious relationship.  You can actually see that they are interested in having a serious relationship, they just don’t want to commit to someone they don’t know.

While I agree that all the interactions on this show are artificially hyper inflated, they are still producing real responses.  The reactions are just sped up do to the stressful situations from the rose ceremonies and millions of people watching on tv.

The point I’m trying to make is that it is important to know that just because you may feel a strong connection to a man does not mean he feels the same way at that moment.  This doesn’t mean he can’t get there with a little time, so the key is patience.  This is why so many people suggest waiting three months and a commitment from a man before sleeping with him.  Most men are readily willing to jump into bed with a woman they don’t even like, so using sex to gauge a man’s interest is not useful.  The only way to truly test his interest is by waiting and seeing how long he is willing to wait for you.

Another thing that can tip the scales in your favor is to be there during a tough time.  If you are willing to help a man you are just dating while he is sick, injured, or in emotional distress you will see his heart open up very quickly to you.  Men are suckers for women who can prove they are willing to stick around during the tough times.


Paul Wright

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