Well I’m here to tell you no matter how confident a man is, if life is beating him up his confidence will take a beating with it. Knowing women are attracted to confident men, if a man is dating or in a relationship and things are not going well for him, he will withdraw. He doesn’t want to been seen as weak or lacking confidence because women are not as attracted to a man who is weak or lacking confidence. How does a man hide this by slowly pulling away.
If you can’t see it, than you will not be able to lose interest in him. His true hope is that eventually thinks will get better and with it his confidence will come back. Sadly, usually these problems only grow worst and the man tries to disappear into a shell.
I know there is nothing worst than watching someone you love and care about slowly disappear from you. Usually this is not what the man wants to happen. He doesn’t want to lose you, he doesn’t want to you to become less attracted to him, which is why he is trying to hide what he believes you will find to be unattractive behavior. In doing so he is developing other behavior that is just as unattractive. However, this is not his intention.
The worst thing you can do at this moment is attack him for pulling away. I know it hurts, but believe me he is hurting just as much as you if not more. Becoming angry, yelling at him or becoming upset about his behavior is just going to cause him to go into full on retreat mode.
When you man is in this kind of state try and think of him as a little bunny hiding under the bed. He is scared and hiding, desperately trying to figure out how he can get back to being that Alpha wolf he once was. In the meantime, he frightens easily and disappears in a flash if he hears any scary noises or is confronted by anything confrontational while he is so weak.
The only way to coax a scared bunny from under your bed is by speaking in a soft and comforting voice. This is exactly what you need to do with your boyfriend/husband when they are in such a critical point. Yell at him at how he is hurting you and he will just run thinking about how if he is not there than he can’t possibly hurt you.
Comfort him, support him and let him know that you want to do whatever you can to help him is the way you can slowly pull him from himself. That is just the start, because talk is cheap and when a man is so beat up it can be hard for him to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Give him suggestions about what you can do to help solve his crisis. Point out how it really isn’t that big of a deal and how the both of you can easily overcome this together.
The great thing about doing this is that not only will it help him to get back to where he was but his confidence will return and transform. Now instead of being confident in himself, he will find a new form of confidence in you and in your relationship together.
Don’t see him pulling away as a death sentence, but as an opportunity to build your relationship back up so that it is stronger than ever before. It is moments like these that make truly strong loving and lasting relationships.