Vancouver is one of the few cities in the world where you will actually hear women complain that they get hit on too much. In fact, some women are so sick of being thought of attractive enough to be hit on that they turn down guys like annoying pests. Some even make sport of it and humiliate and embarrass men. Why? Because he thought you were attractive? Shame on him or shame on you?
Sure, there are some creeps and complete sleaze balls out there, but unfortunately for the women who make sport of slamming men who have built up the courage to hit on them, good men are watching you.
Ladies, by now you should know men like to watch.
When men see something they like, we like to watch it, that’s why sports is so fascinating to us and probably why it’s hard to get our undivided attention when the game is on, we’re listening, we just don’t want to miss anything.
The same holds true in respect to women. We love to watch. Sure, it sounds creepy, but it’s no coincidence when the guy who has been staring at you from across the room all night, suddenly ends up right beside you.
Whether accurate or not, the fact is men gather a lot of personal information about a woman just by watching how she turns down other men. Is she courteous? Is she arrogant? A bitch? Flirty? Shy? Too nice? Too mean?
For some guys, a woman can go from attractive to unattractive in a second just by the way she turns another guy down.
Many times my friends and I have watched women toy with men that they know have no chance, yet they allow them to buy drinks all night, only to pull a Houdini act on the poor schmucks once they’ve had enough.
That’s fine, actually, that’s fair in my opinion. If the man is unable to impress you or win you over in the allotted time he’s been given that’s on him. Generally speaking, most men would love that opportunity rather than being told to “take a hike.”
The only time men don’t care how you turn another guy down is if you’re already his girl or if he knows you’re interested in him. If neither is the case, more often than not, he’s now making a judgement call on your character or at least trying to.
Why do men do this? The answer is simple. We have to gauge whether we can expect a similar response. The truth is, many men, like many people are afraid of rejection, and even more men are afraid of public humiliation. An even bigger truth is that many men are more willing to keep their ego intact than risk irreparable damage to it by talking to an attractive girl that may humiliate them.
Of course, no one expects a woman to have to entertain every Tom, Dick and Harry that approaches them, but putting your hand in a man’s face, completely and utterly ignoring him, or humiliating him publically, are red flags that other guys watch for. Not only is it unattractive to good guys watching, but it’s bad karma. You don’t always have to unsheathe your social sword when you’re getting hit on. The bottom line is that classy women know how to turn guys down without ripping their hearts out and good guys are looking for classy women.
NOW, I’d be lying through perfect and pearly white teeth if I said I’m not aware of the countless douchebags out there whose cat calls, terrible pick up lines and just downright classless and lame approach to meeting women has contributed to some women being downright fed up. I understand, good men understand, and sometimes it’s necessary to put Mr. Douche in his place. Don’t get me wrong, on that, the good guys watching are giving you bonus points.
Take home message here ladies is just try and be aware of how you are turning down men, you might just scare off some of the good ones. If you’re thinking, fine, you didn’t want those guys if they’re not man enough anyways, which may or not be true, you should also consider that they’re thinking you’re not womanly enough either, which also may or may not be true. Either way, both parties miss out.
Let them down easy ladies.